Thursday.

After the am routine, day began by heading to McCallum to greet 150 2nd graders and 35 1st graders from Reagan, as well as, 125 5th graders from Lincoln.  They were on their trip to see Walking The Tightrope, a focus work we've been exploring for the last 3 weeks.

As usual, when they saw me, it was like a miracle was happening!  Hugs, arms outstretched, "Miss Stephanie !" squeals, small grouping gathering much to the teachers' smile/stern countenance.

Around 8am I got a call from my gyno's nurse saying there's abnormal tissue from my PAP test taken last week.  So, I made an appointment for a colposcopy for next Wednesday.  I think she's going to do a biopsy at the same time.  Swell... By Monday I should have my mammo and bone density results.

I do know I feel cripplingly tired most of the time.  But, it very well, and probably is boredom/depression.  This blinding loneliness is overwhelming and I just can't seem motivated to get out of it.  It's just too easy to come home, walk the dog, take a nap, fix dinner, have a glass or two of wine, watch tv and head to bed by 10.  Is this boredom/depression or just the fuck-up-ed-ness of being 62?  I just hate it.

So, in the continuing research for going back to school for a masters, the first step, I think, is to get a psych degree.  Next week I'll write out some emails to RDT people and ask if that's the appropriate track, call the U of C, Palm Desert and ask same questions; continue looking at funding, grants, scholarships, work study, etc, as that's the only way I have to go.  But, at least it's allowing a healthy focus in this crappy crag mire.